Previously Unpublished: A Chat with Robin Riker (Pt. 1)
When it comes to these many interviews that I’m finding in my archives that never got published, I’m also finding regrets for the fact that they never got published, and those regrets are particularly profound with this one.
When I heard that Robin Riker was publishing a book about her career (A Survivor’s Guide to Hollywood: How to Play the Game Without Losing Your Soul), I was immediately onboard for grabbing a copy, so I did. Yes, that’s right, I actually bought a copy, and she was kind enough to sign it for me, too. But before I ordered it, because we’d been Facebook friends for awhile at that point, I said, “If you’d be up for it, I’d love to interview you about the book and your career,” and we decided that if the scheduling was workable, we’d actually do an in-person interview at the Langham Hotel in Pasadena while I was in town for the Television Critics Association press tour. As such, when she signed my book, she referenced it.
So why didn’t the interview make it into print at the time? A combination of reasons. For one, I pitched it to the A.V. Club as a Random Roles, and they said “no.” Then I was hoping to place it somewhere else, but I couldn’t find anywhere that paid…and I really needed to get paid for my time because, you know, mortgage companies prefer it when you get paid. Had we done the interview during the subsequent press tour, then it would’ve landed during the brief window when The Virginian-Pilot was paying me to do an online column, and I could’ve placed it there. Instead, I set it aside out of financial necessity, and… Well, here we are now in 2022.
It sucks that it’s taken so long to see the light of day, but what a wonderful conversation it was. Robin was—and remains—delightful, and not only was she extremely understanding of the fact that I had a sore throat, but in my wife’s absence, she made sure I was drinking hot tea with lemon while we were together, so as to do everything possible to help clear it up. There was also a great deal of sidebar chatter that I’ve mostly removed, just because most of it involves stories you’ve heard elsewhere within this newsletter, but there’s plenty left for your enjoyment, and there’s still more to come in Pt. 2!
So I was going through your substantial filmography, and I noticed that... Well, according to IMDb, anyway, it looks like your first three roles all involved playing nurses.
Robin Riker: Well, you're right: M*A*S*H was a nurse and Welcome Back Kotter was a nurse, and...what was the other one?
Baa Baa Black Sheep, ostensibly.
Oh, yes! But I was in uniform. Like, an officer sort of nurse.
Yes, you're listed as 1st Nurse on there, then just Nurse on M*A*S*H, and finally Sexy Nurse on Welcome Back Kotter.
Movin' up! [Laughs.] Oh, that's funny. And a coincidence I never noticed! I did have names, though.
Not according to IMDb, you didn't.
Seriously?
Yep. Nothin' but titles.
All right, I'll have to get them, then. I'll have to look them up. Because I definitely had names. Although Sexy Nurse sounds familiar to me. [Laughs.] But I did have a name in all of them!
At this point, we were interrupted by the waiter, and when we started talking again, the conversation wound its way into talking about Random Roles, probably because at this point I didn’t have any idea where this interview would ultimately end up running. She asked about some of my favorite pieces I’d done for the feature, and as is often the case when that question is posed, I told her about my interview with Christopher Plummer, specifically his now-legendary response when I brought up Starcrash. Needless to say, Robin laughed, and we return to the conversation immediately after she’s done so…
You know, that's one of the reasons I loved the thought of acting and film from the time I was a little girl: to travel, to go places. I still love going on location.
That's usually a through line when it comes to Random Roles interviews: inevitably you'll hit on some project that you know the actor knows in their heart was terrible, and the first words out of their mouth are something like, "Well, I got to go to..."
Exactly! Well, the worst one that I ever did, I did in L.A. But they paid me up front. [Laughs.] They put the money in the bank before I showed up for the first day!
What was that?
It was a film called The Stoneman, and it was made by a man named Lucky Brown, whose father was doctor to the stars in old Hollywood. I think that somebody's wife—someone of Clark Gable's echelon, but not Clark—delivered her baby on Lucky Brown's father's pool table in Beverly Hills...just by necessity, not design! So he was an old-timer, and he had a studio, and his wife... I think his wife is a publicist. Jeanne Brown. Anyway, Lucky's been around since the heyday of Hollywood, and he was eighty-something when he did this. But he had a little studio probably the size of this [hotel bar], maybe a little bit into the hallway, and that was for the offices, the soundstage, and everything. It was on Seward or some street off Santa Monica Boulevard in Hollywood.
He raised the money for the film by telemarketing. You know, just going, "Do you wanna put in?" And he went to people like car dealers on the east coast and various people who are not associated with show business but often have money. And for their investment, they got a part in the movie.
It sounds like Ed Wood.
Exactly! It does! [Laughs.] It actually does! And the concept was, a scientist - an anthropologist, played by Pat Morita - discovered this perfectly-preserved body in a bog in South America somewhere. The Stoneman! And he brought him back to his lab in the university where he was a professor, and he's unveiling to the other professors, faculty, and powers-that-be at the university his find. It's in a black studio, all dark, and there are these giant sawhorses, and you have to climb up a ladder a little bit, and there's this enormous coffin that all the faculty are gathered around. And he climbs up the ladder to say, "And this is my discovery!" or whatever. And he kind of cleans its nostril or does something, and he turns away to say something else, and when he turns away, the Stoneman inhales and breathes, so you know that he's alive. But most of the people who are playing the faculty are these people who had bought parts in the movie by contributing.
So there's this one man who has to say something like, "What do you think of Professor Stevens' find?" And he's supposed to say something like, "It's ridiculous! I don't think it has any merit whatsoever!" But what he ended up saying was something like, "It's not...because nothing is...worth nothing. No!" And then you heard, "Cut! Print!" [Laughs.] Because, you know, every inch of film back then was precious! And the whole movie was locked-off shots done on some ancient wooden tripod with a big camera. Actually, the director of photography they had—Richard [Bennett]—was a good D.P. He'd done some other things. But he knew Lucky, and it was kind of a favor.
Christopher Atkins was in it—he's the one from The Blue Lagoon, right?—and Pat Morita, and one of the guys from The Love Boat. Not Captain Stubing, but Doc.
Bernie Kopell?
Yes! Bernie Kopell was in it.
[Suspiciously.] Is this on IMDb?
I don't know. And if it isn't, don't put it there! [Laughs.]
I have never put anything on IMDb. But it sounds fantastic.
Well, I played an archeologist, and...everything is locked off, so we're all in the office, and we're all in a little row, because the camera doesn't move. And then we're out in the woods, because the beast has gotten away and has strangled and killed people, so we're on the hunt. And when I read the script, it sounded like kind of a fun B-movie thing, and they paid me up front, so I said, "Okay!" And it was just an offer: "Come and do this." And I'll do pretty much anything if it's an offer, as long as it doesn't involve something embarrassing with farm animals...but if I could do it in Rome, then I'd go!
Henceforth to be known as the Christopher Plummer Principle.
Exactly! [Laughs.] So anyway, there's a shot in the film when we're out on a cliff somewhere by the ocean, and we've discovered that two young lovers have been killed in their car at Lookout Point because of the beast, so now we know it's definitely him. And we're all in this wide shot, and I hear, "Cut! Print!"
And I say, "Lucky, don't you want any coverage on the people who are supposed to be terrified and letting the audience know? Or did you want no coverage whatsoever?" And he kind of sighed and said, "All right, let's go over here!" And then 15 minutes later, he said, "Well, that's another thousand feet of film wasted!" [Laughs.] And he walked away! At the end, when it was all done, they were still calling people to get money to get the editing going and everything.
Well, I can now confirm that it is indeed on IMDb.
Oh, it is on there? Let me see!
Here you go. Also in it were Ron Masak, Dennis Haskins...
Dennis Haskins! Who does he play in it? I see him every now and then for lunch, and I forgot we even worked together!
He plays Dean Hendricks. And Larry Manetti plays Sgt. C. "Chickie" Mudryck.
Who else was in it?
The only other actor I recognize from their photo is Lincoln Kirkpatrick.
Do they mention me in it?
Oh, yeah. You're in the top three. Pat Morita, Christopher Atkins, Robin Riker. You're right in the thick of it.
I'm golden! Well, when we found out that, oh, dear God, it has been released, we ordered the film, and we got it...and you can see the time code at the bottom! Not entirely. They tried to mask it. But the top ends of the digits keep changing, so you can see it. And it turned out that in order to set it up... The bookends of the film didn't work. And Pat Morita was a wild man. The more he released that this wasn't going to be any kind of movie, he started drinking like crazy. We were up in Bakersfield at one point to do a court exterior thing, because I'm trying to get him to stop something and...I don't know what the hell it is. [Laughs.]
But Pat and I, we were outside the courthouse, exiting the place, and while we're waiting for them to set up, Morita's dropping trou in the middle of the street, and to the great amusement of the people of Bakersfield. Oh, it was really, really something. And the more he realized how bad it was going to be, the less he gave a damn about what he did or how he did it. Oh, my God, it was so... [Shakes her head.] But, you know, if you don't have at least one of those in your career, you're not even trying.
Pat Morita, Christopher Atkins, and Robin Riker in The Stoneman. (Photo courtesy of Lee Roth @ Roth Stock Pictures)
I wonder if there are any reviews on IMDb.
Oh, my God, see if there are!
There is one.
Uh-oh. [Laughs.] What do they say?
Well, you get a shout-out:
"The cast is not too full of unknowns. Pat Morita (the old karate dude from The Karate Kid) heads the cast along with Atkins (now well out of his youth and his Pirate Movie days). Also here are some TV personalities such as Robin Riker, who's done just about every TV series in the 90's..."
Yay!
This is the grand finale, though:
"The only reason to rent this film would be for Christopher Atkins completists. Otherwise, it's not scary, well filmed, or acted, really. It's funny, though, because it thinks it is a serious film, and it's earnestness is a little sad and cute in a way."
Oh, my gosh. Well, like I was saying, because the front end and the back end didn't quite turn out the way Lucky wanted them to, he became the narrator. He's got a pencil-thin mustache, kind of an Errol Flynn mustache, and he always did wear kind of a safari jacket, so you see him walking up to his cluttered desk, which was his office at the studio, and he sits on the edge of the desk, smoking a pipe, and says, "You know, I had a most extraordinary experience. I heard a story you may not believe..." And he sort of sets it up from there.
It sounds like Commander McBragg. "Quite."
Oh, and just to give you two more facts about the film. The guy who was the Stoneman was a wrestler of some kind. Steve Henneberry was his name. But they put the worst beard and worst nose ever on him! And his axe was a wooden stick and some lacing with a stone at the end of it. But the killing edge of the stone was... I mean, it looked like a half-assed piece of Styrofoam. And when they discovered him in the bog? It was actually the jacuzzi at Lucky's house with a couple of ferns around it. They didn't even put foliage or anything on the bottom of it. In fact, it may have been blue. [Laughs.] And it was clear, clear water, as though he'd been bathing, not as if he'd been bogged! It was so funny...but the check cleared!
And that's what counts.
That, and it's a good story.
That's the best thing about doing these Random Roles interviews: you get to ask about stuff that people haven't been asked about in however long, and in most cases they're, like, "Well, I think the statute of limitations is up, so I can tell you this story..."
I know! And you know what? My only caveat, the only reason I hesitate at all, is that Lucky is still around, and I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings or anything like that.
Well, based on that story, you're not making him sound bad, you're just making him sound thrifty.
Yes, and thrifty he was. That's very good. And you know what? Even as I was doing it and going, "Oh, my God," I was also thinking to myself, "Well, the son of a bitch is making a movie!" And he had a finished product at the end of it, you know? And this was before you could just do it on your iPhone and put it on YouTube. He got it together to make a movie. That's a good thing!
[For the record, Lucky Brown passed away in 2019, so between the fact that he’s no longer with us and the fact that the story really doesn’t make him sound bad, I figured it was safe to run with it.]
As long as we're talking about obscurities, I noticed another one on your IMDb page that I've asked someone else about, so I'm curious what you remember about it: Herndon. I talked to Ted McGinley about it.
Oh, you did?
Yeah, he gave me a surprising amount of stuff about it.
Well, I loved it. It was a lot of fun to do. I think I'd just done a series or something at Paramount, and Garry Marshall asked me to come and do this thing. I don't remember auditioning for it, but I may have. I played Connie Kokorioum, the girl voted Most Likely To. I remember at the time I was drinking this particular kind of tea. Because I was was wearing this slinky black dress, on the set I just drank this tea that was supposed to help you lose weight...and it actually worked, but I was much younger then. [Laughs.] I remember watching Michael Richards doing all of his funny pratfalls and things that eventually became his signature. Actually, I guess they were already his signature, but soon everybody knew about them!
The only thing I didn't like about it was that I was so mean to him. Because in high school, I was the absolute opposite. Since I was born, I never stayed anywhere more than two years, and I graduated early from high school, but probably because I'm accustomed to being the outsider, I've always had a soft spot for those who were, and I always made an effort to include them in whatever way. So to be the one who was the bitch, who was teasing him and led him on and broke his heart or just ignored him... That's the only thing I didn't like about it. But it's always fun to play bitches, too! So it had its plusses and its minuses, but it was mostly plusses. I mean, I didn't turn the role down because I was mean. It was all pretty much fun. But I think just working is fun, whatever you're doing. If you're doing something you like or peripheral to something you like or you're helping others do something that you like and you know they like... It's all good.
Early in your career, you did an episode of The Rockford Files.
I did, but I didn't work with James Garner.
Dang...
[Laughs.] It was actually an episode that was intended as a backdoor pilot. It was called "Just a Couple of Guys," and they were supposed to be... One of them was Greg Antonacci, who just got killed on Boardwalk Empire. He played Al Capone's boss? And the other actor was... [Hesitates.] Do you remember that movie Midnight Express? The lead guy, the one who got put in jail, his name was Brad Davis. Well, he had a brother, Gene Davis. And Gene and Greg were the stars of the spinoff.
James Garner was in it, but I didn't have any scenes with him. But I had several scenes with these two guys, because I worked for the mayor, and they wanted me to dig up some information for them on this case they were on. [Doing a hoodlum voice.] "C'mon, just give it to us. Cross yer legs and cry into a tissue, he'll give it to ya. You're a girl!" [Laughs.] And, of course, I say "no," because I'm a professional and I'm not going to give them that stuff by nefarious means. So that was a lot of fun, and it was early on, so it was great footage and a great credit for an actor having just come to Hollywood.
And then some half a dozen years later or maybe a little more, I go in to audition for the role of Kelly on the show Brothers, and Greg Antonacci is one of the writer/producers on it! So that was a nice little connection there. Anyway, that's really all I remember, other than shooting at Universal, enjoying it, and having a good time!
So what was the experience of Get a Life like?
Oh, that was great. That was really fun. Chris Elliott is fabulous to work with, and Sam Robards was a dream. He played my husband, and it was so much fun to work with him. He's so smart and so funny.
And Bob Elliott... It was so hard for Bob, because they had him saying to Elinor Donahue... Elinor Donahue! My God, when I was a little girl, I grew up watching Elinor Donahue, and here she is on the show that I'm on also! But Bob would have to say about Chris's character, "That kid is an ass. He's so stupid, he couldn't find his ass with both hands and a flashlight!" or something. That sort of thing. But he could not do it. He said, "I've never called anyone something like that in my life!" And the whole Bob and Ray persona, of that team, was so gentle and sweet that it's easy to believe that he never really did! So it was really a hard slog for him to try and get to the point of berating his son by using that language.
I talked to Chris about a month ago in connection with Eagleheart.
Oh, I don't know Eagleheart!
It's his Adult Swim series...and it's kind of surreal, but it's great. Not unlike Get a Life, come to think of it.
The one thing about working on Get a Life was that David Mirkin was one of the producers, and he occasionally fancied himself a little bit of a David Lynch or something. I remember that he would go way beyond what was necessary to shoot, to reposition and everything, because we didn't do that in front of a live audience. That was a two-camera, no-audience show, so it was shot more like a film. And there was one time when he wanted me to put a cigarette out in Chris's eye, and I just didn't want to do it. Because I knew that people were watching the show and...I just didn't want to do it.
All it takes is one stupid person...
Yep. So I resisted it and...I'd already been on the show for a season - this was in the second season - and it only lasted two seasons. But he got so angry about it. He was, like, "You're gonna do it!" It was all about dominating whoever it was who was resisting him at that moment, not me in particular. But I said, "What are you gonna do, David? Fire me if I don't do this? Just let me put it out in the palm of his hand or on his jacket or his chest. But not his eye!" Now, admittedly, I have a thing about eyes, but... [Sighs.] I can't remember, but I think I did it - I'm so ashamed - just to get the show finished. But because of David... [Hesitates.] Are you familiar with the term "Martini shot"?
I've heard it, but I don't know what it means.
It means the next shot's in glass. The last set-up, the last shot, we're done, this is the martini, we'll be going home. And there's also this thing called the Abby Singer shot, which is the shot before the Martini shot. Now, Abby Singer's daughter was our assistant director on this show - JoAnn Singer - so one day we'd gone shooting, shooting, shooting, David Mirkin was going all David Lynch or whatever, and we wrapped late. And everybody's leaving, they're getting to their cars...and David needs another shot. And everybody gets called, and they all come back to the set. And we referred to that as the JoAnn Singer shot, which is the shot that you get after you've wrapped for the day and have to come back and get a shot. [Laughs.] She was great. I loved working for her. And I got to work with David Steinberg, who directed one of the episodes, and I got to see some old stars that I'd grown up watching. Jack Jones, he was on there. I think Elinor Donahue had a crush on him. Martin Mull was on there, too. It was just so much fun.
[At this point, we entered into an extended sidebar which involved my reminiscences of meeting up with Martin Mull at the TCA tour and our offhanded discussion of my maybe helping him with a memoir someday, and from there I ended up telling her about my aborted attempt at helping Alex Rocco with his memoir.]
Well, if it seems in any way organic and you wanted to do it, you could tell him that we talked and that I say 'hi.' Because I did an episode of The Famous Teddy Z with him, and we had a great time together. I was the one who was slapping him around and throwing him up against the wall. [Laughs.] And every time we'd see each other afterwards, it's a big hug. So if you ever felt like it, please give him my regards. Maybe that'll help reconnect you.
I may do that. He's a real sweetheart. I really enjoyed talking to him.
Yeah, he's a nice guy. I liked working with him and talking with him, too.
Okay, this must surely be the most ridiculous one I have written down, so let's get it over with.
Okay!
Body Chemistry II: The Voice of a Stranger.
Well...
With Morton Downey, Jr. as Big Chuck? Come on now.
And Gregory Harrison, who was my leading man.
Jeremy Piven has a small role in it, too.
I know! You know, you could tell right away that he was going to be something.
I feel like that film alone is why I've yet to be able to get him to do Random Roles, because of course I'm going to ask him about it.
Of course you would! And why the hell not?
I mean, the title alone... I don't need to see it. If you're in a movie called that, I need to ask about it.
Well, it just so happens that I met my husband on that movie, so the name of it was quite prophetic! I was going through a divorce at the time, and... Well, I'll get to the husband story in a minute! But I auditioned for the director, Adam Simon, who I liked very much. He went on to be referenced in The Player. "Don't let that Adam Simon on the lot!" says Tim Robbins. [Laughs.] And so a very good friend of mine, a guy named Richard Gentner, who was mentored by Sam Peckinpah, he edited the movie, and there was about 10-15 minutes of the film before I came on. But as soon as he saw the footage - and we weren't friends yet, so I didn't learn this until later - he realized that the story of Gregory Harrison and me was the heart of the story, and all this other stuff, all this hot sex stuff, was important, but it was secondary. So he cut out those first 10-15 minutes of the film to get to me quicker, which was lovely to learn, and we became friends, as you would imagine we might!
I really enjoyed shooting that movie, though. It was really good. And one day on the set... Okay, so I was going through a divorce at the time, and it was not pleasant. It was my choice, but it was still not pleasant, because the man I was divorcing was not being pleasant. So we'd been going to therapy and all that, and I had decided that therapy was not working. We'd chewed through three therapists already.
So we were shooting on location in Pasadena, I was on my way to my trailer, I'm walking down the sidewalk, and I'm composing the letter I'm going to write to my husband in my mind, and I look up. And some of these houses in Pasadena, there's a wall, and then the lawn goes up, and then there's the porch at the house. So the camera was up on the porch of the house, quite a distance away, and I'm walking down the street, and this is how quick it is: I'm walking, I look up, I look down, and in that one look, I see Evan sitting on the camera - he was the first assistant cameraman at the time - and I'd never seen him before, because he'd replaced the first AC halfway through the movie. And I went, "That's a very self-possessed person." I thoroughly remember that thought coming to me. And then for the rest of the day I was shooting a scene with Gregory and his dad in the film, I'm this far away from Evan, but I don't remember really connecting with him in any kind of way.
Jump-cut to 10 days later, we're about to finish the movie, and I went to the set that day, and I needed kissing. [Laughs.] I didn't need to pick out furniture with anybody. There was a guy on the set who I thought would be kissable, but I knew that he had a girlfriend, and I didn't want to get in the middle of that, even though it was just a kiss. So Evan... He was really tall, but he was also really quiet. But when he spoke, it was funny or insightful.
So he's right on the camera behind me, we're shooting, I'm the producer of the radio show that's the focus of the thing. It's the last day of filming, we break for dinner, we go into this room where those long tables are for dinner, I sit at this corner, he sits at that corner, and it's only the two of at this point. So I say, "So, Evan, are you married?" And at that point, the second leading lady sits down next to me and says, "Oh, very smooth, Robin." And, of course, I wanted to clock her. [Laughs.] But I didn't, because I'm well-bred. And he answered. He said, "Divorced. Why?" But then the director sits down next to me, and the director of photography, and we all sit and talk, and it erupts into conversation, lovely, interesting stuff.
And then at the end of it, we're leaving, and I'm the last one...and Evan falls in line beside me and says, "I'm not going to let you off the hook so easily. Why did you ask me?" And I said, "Because I wanted to kiss you, and I didn't want to do it if there was anyone else involved." And so he said, "I'd be honored," and sort of leaned a little forward...and I said, "Well, not right at this moment!" And he said, "Okay, fine!" So we wrap, and everybody's having beer or whatever, and I'm talking to somebody outside, and then they leave, and Evan comes out and says, "Would now be all right?" And I said, "Yeah!" He said, "I know just where to go." Because I'm 5'4" and he's 6'3", he took me by the hand and took me around a set of stairs. It was on Roger Corman's old lot on Venice Boulevard - it was a Corman picture. So he puts me up on a couple of steps, and we kiss, and...we've pretty much been together ever since!
And then funnily enough, it wasn't terribly long after that when I was doing another Corman picture... I still wasn't divorced, but I played the titular role in a film called Stepmonster, with Alan Thicke, Corey Feldman, Ami Dolenz... There were some decent people! George Gaynes was in it, I think. Oh, and John Astin! But I play this creature from outer space who assumes human form in order to breed at some point. You know how it happens. [Laughs.] So there's a scene where I'm dressed in a wedding gown, and I'll never forget this picture. I get a call from someone saying, "There's a call for you, Robin!" I'm standing in my wedding gown, holding my bouquet, and I'm on a studio payphone hearing that my divorce is final! I mean, talk about surreal! [Laughs.]
Just watched Robin last night in the underrated Alligator. I hope it gets a mention in Pt. 2 of your interview.